The most horrible, horrible thing
happened today. More horrible than the time I went to
rent some naughty films but the tapes had been switched
around and I ended up watching Fly Fishing For You And
Your Waders and Basic Instinct. My nights were
filled with very many horrid dreams of Ms. Sharon Stone's
Hairy CrotchBeast rising up out of a lake and attacking
me while I tried to fish in my hot pink waders! I woke
weeping on many, many mornings.
What happened today was even worse.
I was preparing Master Lex's special breakfast of two
dozen raw oysters and Fruity's largest cucumber when I
heard voices beside the pool. One of them was the sexy
purr of my Master, but the other...
I tiptoed out to have a look, and there I saw him
speaking to my own brother, Esteban! He was standing
beside the pool in a blue satin jumpsuit with flared legs
and black patent platform shoes. I screamed and dropped
the breakfast tray, drawing their attention.
"Good morning, brother," Esteban said with a
grin that made my tummy cold.
Master smiled in greeting, and gave a wave of his
wonderfully toned arm. "Enrique! Wonderful news.
I've hired your brother Esteban to be our new pool
boy!"
"No! For all that is holy in the world! For all that
is holey in my body! Please, Master, no!" I dropped
on my knees before him, as I had often daydreamed of
doing, but this time it was not for anything fun.
"Now, now, Enrique. We need help with the pool. I'm
not trying to replace you. It's just that you're nearly
overrun with your duties already, and it would be good to
share one of those duties with Esteban."
My Master is so sweet and considerate and sexy. I knew I
could not dissuade him, so I nodded numbly and began to
plot in my mind how to get rid of Esteban.
That night, Sneaky came over and gave little Enrique's
head some nice licks. It did take my mind off matters for
a while, but the nightmares still came... |